


You Are My Princess, O' Fair Ginger Maiden

by Matloc



Series: Videogame Woes [1]
Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: AkaKuro as overly competitive dorks, Akashi doesn't mind playing dirty, Castle Crashers, Humor, M/M, Neither does Kuroko, Videogames, bakashi, gamer!au, how unfunny can this author get, still can't stop with the purple prose, the cheesy title is the April Fool's joke, vidya
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-01
Updated: 2015-04-01
Packaged: 2018-03-20 14:25:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 895
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3653724
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Matloc/pseuds/Matloc
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kuroko and Akashi are playing Castle Crashers, and they finally get to the part where they have to fight each other for a kiss from the princess. But is Akashi really interested in that? // Gamer!AU</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Are My Princess, O' Fair Ginger Maiden

**Author's Note:**

> so this is a little break I took from writing All That Glitters cuz jaysus that fic gonna kill me. anyway, i decided to start an akakuro gamer!AU series, which is perfect cuz gamers are generally vEEERRYyy competitive, and Akashi and Kuroko are vERREIIRRRYYY competitive. Akashi's that asshole who somehow manages to play better than you even tho you practised playing that game FOR MONTHSSSS, and Kuroko's just a ticking time bomb exploding whenever someone steals his hard-earned win/kill out of sheer luck, except he doesn't explode, just silently broods 4 lyf cuz he's a SWEET BBY ANGELLLLL /melts
> 
> what can I say, videogames bring out the worst in people, and i'm gonna put this fuckin couple through endless misery to prove it

The Blue Knight signals his companion to wait. The best part is about to come, and he really wants to catch his partner off guard. After their amazing show of teamwork in the arena, this is only a given, according to the Blue Knight.

The princess looks upon her saviors with big, teary eyes, waiting to be freed. The ginger-haired girl is tied up to a cruddy wooden pole that is tapering dangerously thin into the ground. It's a surprise the stick just doesn't end up breaking under her weight. Though, given from how it is wobbling back and forth, they need to act quick before a poor girl's nose gets smashed in.

The Blue Knight soars high, weapon poised to cut the ropes binding the princess. He only allows a few words for the Red Knight as a warning for what's to come.

"Prepare yourself, Akashi-kun."

The Blue Knight cuts the princess free, dropping her to the ground safe and sound. Then he immediately jumps towards the Red Knight, who doesn't even get a countdown before the fight starts. This nets the Blue Knight a preemptive strike against him, but the Red Knight dodges right at the last moment.

"Oh? What an interesting twist."

The Red Knight sends a lightning bolt towards his opponent, who jumps up to avoid it, only to get smashed in by a life-size lollipop. The Red Knight spins his lollipop weapon in a cruel taunt, before racing towards his fallen comrade-slash-enemy. The Blue Knight finally gets up and parries the hit with his giant broccoli stick. His trusty weapon clashes against the pink confectionery, sending both knights flying a few inches. They flip back into their offensive stance at the same time, just like how they used to do back in the past, when they would fight side by side.

But now they have turned on each other, their sturdy friendship already crumbling. Perhaps the two have always lived in a castle of sand, and the princess, though not more than a gentle breeze, is strong enough to blow it all away. Blow them away, back onto the ground where they now fight to the death for her kiss. With the way the ginger princess is cheering them on, this betrayal, this tragic demise to a beautiful relationship built on the blood and sweat of trust, will, camaraderie, loyalty, honor—it all seems to be part of her evil plot. The princess may not be as innocent as she seems, but her valiant knights will never find out until it's too late.

Because one of them has to die. Now.

 

\----

 

Kuroko twists with the jerky movements of his knight, almost bumping into Akashi's shoulder. He is smashing his X button hard, and the sequenced clacking coming from his right tells him that Akashi is turning his keyboard into mush as well. Things are too busy on his screen for him to take his eyes off for even a second, instead just wailing on Akashi's Red Knight with his broccoli.

But Akashi manages to get another of his annoying bolts in, the Blue Knight flinches. That is all Akashi needs to begin whittling down Kuroko's HP to minimum, though Kuroko hits the space bar before Akashi can get his last hit in.

Now both of their HPs are down to withstanding just one last hit. Kuroko smirks, readying his fingers for his finishing ice combo.

"I'm sorry, Akashi-kun, but the princess's lips are mine." Kuroko declares with triumph.

Suddenly he feels a hand grab the back of his head. Before he knew it, his own lips are stolen by his boyfriend, who is definitely grinning into the kiss. Kuroko struggles but the strong hand keeps him in place, letting Akashi assault his mouth. He moans his protest; Akashi is having none of it as he tilts his head further and dives in deeper. The redhead traces Kuroko's lips with a teasing flick of his tongue, and that is all that's needed for Kuroko to become undone. He parts his lips with a sigh, inviting Akashi to devour him.

So he is left dazed and confused when Akashi pulls away right as he gives in. It is both frustrating and embarrassing that he got roped into a make out session so easily and now Akashi won't give him what he wants, even though he's the one who started it.

The red hot rage that bubbles inside Kuroko, however, when Akashi turns back to the screen to press a button, wipes away any lingering desire whatsoever as he hears the ding from his laptop signaling his loss. His Blue Knight lies beheaded on the field, it is such a pathetic sight. Never once has he been duped like this before. The anger, it overflows in waves of unbridled malice.

"I won't let you kiss anyone else, not even in video games." Akashi justifies proudly.

The chalice of Kuroko's ire tips forward. It spills into an overwhelming desire to hurt, to maim, _to kill_. His eyes widen in a hateful glare, mouth twitching like the maw of a lion often does as it snarls at its prey. And for the first time in his life, Akashi may have just stared Death in the face.

It takes 3 days of unhealthy vanilla shake indulgence before Akashi finally convinces Kuroko back into their bed again.

**Author's Note:**

> Castle Crashers is a super fun game, but it'll quickly turn into a swearfest when you gotta fight 3 of your friends to get the opportunity to make out (thoroughly) with the princess. 
> 
> My ex and I used to play this a lot with a couple of our buds, and I've always held this track record of snatching ALL THE PRINCESSES in our games so this one time he actually got close to beating me and I screamed at him that if he kisses the girl I'm gonna count it as him cheating on me (YES DAS HOW PETTY I CAN GET BUT COME ON ALL IS FAIR IN LOVE AND VIDYAGAMES) 
> 
> but of course he didn't listen and beat my ass, and I just ragequit the game right then becaUSE FUCK ANYONE WHO TRIES TO RUIN MY TRACK RECORD (ノಠ ∩ಠ)ノ彡( o°o) and I ended up pissing the rest of our teammates off haha. but oh god yes the rage is so real when you lose a close fight
> 
> so yeah you could say it's inspired from IRL events? lol especially Akashi's line at the end haha trust him to get jelly of fictional characters. 
> 
> kuroko's a sweetheart so he didn't kick Bakashi out of bed, he went to sleep on the couch himself. or a different room, whatever suits your fancy.


End file.
